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ASIAMS.NET |
ASIAN AMERICAN ISSUES
The White Stuff: Whiting Wongs & Wonging Whites
hey're our neighbors, buddies, allies, enemies, clients, bosses, employees, lovers and spouses. Many of us have more daily contact with Whites than with other Asians. Consequently, we often feel we know them better than they can ever know us. Maybe that's at the heart of our frustration as Asian Americans. They are as ubiquitous and pervasive as the air we breath while to them it seems we are eternal curiosities, outsiders, exotics.
Bridging the gap?
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And so we sometimes find ourselves lashing out with nasty generalizations about the people we blame for all that seems wrong with American society and, more specifically, our place in it. They are ignorant, shallow, boorish, smelly, sneaky, treacherous, malicious, dumb, weird -- in short, all the labels we feel have been so unfairly slapped on us.
But even as we hurl such epithets we cannot forget the countless acts of kindness, warmth, generosity, friendship, passion and love that we have enjoyed from these very same people. As our anger and frustration subside, we recognize that our fates are inextricably intertwined, not merely in sharing a world, a nation, a society, an economy, a culture -- but often in sharing even our most intimate lives. One in five of today's Asian American marriages are to Whites. And contrary to the imbalance of the past, the ratio of new AM/WF marriages to new AF/WM marriages is steadily approaching unity.
So we naturally have a strong interest in decoding the other side of the equation. Understanding is a two-way street. Fortunately, there are Whites who have enough interest in us as individuals to share their perspectives on us and on their interactions with us. This page is for those who -- as corny as it may sound -- have chosen to serve as bridges.
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Discussions posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:38:55 AM)
"There seems to be a lot of animosity and hostility between Asian women and White women on this site, and I think it's something that needs to be explored. Does anyone have any insights?"
You should watch ElimDate when it involves a white guy, and three white women and an Asian woman. Not what the white women say about the Asian woman. It involves defending one's territory, and as far as the white women are concerned the Asian women have invaded their territory (ie., taken "their" white men!). Let us take an example...at the University of Georgia white sororities would not admit a black woman because the white fraternities would have nothing to do with them. They would not admit an Asian sister because they are afraid that all the frat men would be attracted to her and ignore them. This happened during the Ante-bellum days involving mixed race women. Slave narratives tell us that frequently the boys at debutante parties were attracted to Mulattos...the response of the mistresses was to sell off the mullato slave...No, cannot do that now with Asian women...so best thing to do is not to admit them!
Asian Woman
Thursday, July 11, 2002 at 07:51:36 (PDT)
T.H. Lien and MLK,
Ooh, I think inter-racial people look so cute! My ex-manager was inter-racial. He had such good looks and personality. I used to have a crush on him, but I never told him. Maybe that is why I am so inclined to think that inter-racial people have cute looks to this day :).
Red Red Seashell
Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 18:17:45 (PDT)
Curious girl,
What do you mean? I haven't seen any hostile exchange between Asian women and Caucasian women, in this forum or in reality. I am an AA woman, and I make friends with AA and Caucasian women alike. Why create problems within the women race while we have lots of other problems to deal with?
Red Red Seashell
Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 18:08:02 (PDT)
Curious Girl,
Asian women set the equal rights movement back years. They cater to white males, especially the ones that we would never associate with. And Asian women often behave as sex toys. This gives men who normally would be alone and isolated a false sense of confidence.
ERA Woman
Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 17:12:12 (PDT)
curious girl,
I don't think it has anything to do with race. Girls get catty sometimes. Meow, scratch, scratch.
AC Dropout
Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 13:02:09 (PDT)
There seems to be a lot of animosity and hostility between Asian women and White women on this site, and I think it's something that needs to be explored. Does anyone have any insights?
curious girl
Tuesday, July 09, 2002 at 12:53:11 (PDT)
to T.H. Lien
You're just about as mixed up as I am. How goes the social reaction to your mixedness?
MLK
Monday, July 08, 2002 at 23:35:12 (PDT)
Happy Clam,
And pray tell what large city do you live in where you leave your doors unlocked. I need to make a quick trip to stock up you know.
AC Dropout
Monday, July 08, 2002 at 11:01:18 (PDT)
MLK:
I had a Chinese grandpa married to a half-Filipino half-Malay grandma, and a German grandpa married to a german grandma.
I just call myself Chinese. (or Malaysian-Chinese, since my grandpa's family has been outside China for about 6 generations). It's kinda ridiculous if I tried to claim to be anything else, cuz I don't know enough to function in the other cultures. So I couldn't claim them as my own in addition to Chinese.
T.H. Lien
Sunday, July 07, 2002 at 17:40:22 (PDT)
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