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GOLDSEA |
ASIAMS.NET |
ASIAN AMERICAN ISSUES
The White Stuff: Whiting Wongs & Wonging Whites
hey're our neighbors, buddies, allies, enemies, clients, bosses, employees, lovers and spouses. Many of us have more daily contact with Whites than with other Asians. Consequently, we often feel we know them better than they can ever know us. Maybe that's at the heart of our frustration as Asian Americans. They are as ubiquitous and pervasive as the air we breath while to them it seems we are eternal curiosities, outsiders, exotics.
Bridging the gap?
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And so we sometimes find ourselves lashing out with nasty generalizations about the people we blame for all that seems wrong with American society and, more specifically, our place in it. They are ignorant, shallow, boorish, smelly, sneaky, treacherous, malicious, dumb, weird -- in short, all the labels we feel have been so unfairly slapped on us.
But even as we hurl such epithets we cannot forget the countless acts of kindness, warmth, generosity, friendship, passion and love that we have enjoyed from these very same people. As our anger and frustration subside, we recognize that our fates are inextricably intertwined, not merely in sharing a world, a nation, a society, an economy, a culture -- but often in sharing even our most intimate lives. One in five of today's Asian American marriages are to Whites. And contrary to the imbalance of the past, the ratio of new AM/WF marriages to new AF/WM marriages is steadily approaching unity.
So we naturally have a strong interest in decoding the other side of the equation. Understanding is a two-way street. Fortunately, there are Whites who have enough interest in us as individuals to share their perspectives on us and on their interactions with us. This page is for those who -- as corny as it may sound -- have chosen to serve as bridges.
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Discussions posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:38:55 AM)
AC Dropout,
Care to instruct us on how to control the "O" in public? I'm all ears.
Oops....I mean eyes:)
Tuesday, April 30, 2002 at 13:27:23 (PDT)
to "yes", do you have any ideas as to why we get jealous when we see people of our race date outside our race?
curious
Tuesday, April 30, 2002 at 12:04:06 (PDT)
"Even if a romantic couple is not physically touching, everyone around them knows that they are romantically linked. Ditto goes for the guy-friend-hang-out type situation. It's the vibes that bounce around in a sonar/molecular/electron type fashion that tips people off, I think"
Sorry MLK, but I disagree. Not everyone can pick up on that stuff. Plus some of the more reserved couples can look more like two coworkers sitting together unless there is some sort of touch or something else happening. (No, I don't mean deep tongue action)
Not every couple gives off that kind of vibe.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002 at 08:15:16 (PDT)
i'm personally not racist, but i think it's innate in all of us to feel this sense of jealousy or bitterness when you see a person from your own race dating outside of the race
yes
Monday, April 29, 2002 at 14:18:26 (PDT)
GET A HOTEL ROOM OK?,
You're such a prude. Public sex is cool. The fun is trying to control the "O" face in front of everyone.
AC Dropout
Monday, April 29, 2002 at 11:13:39 (PDT)
MLK,
And I always thought it was the lump in the guys pants that gave it away.
I will have to tame the electrons around me in the future.
AC Dropout
Monday, April 29, 2002 at 11:11:31 (PDT)
to Experienced Fella
"...As far as hanging with a guy, female friends hang with their guy friends too--even Asian female friends. It doesn't mean they're crazy about them."
That's true, but hanging out with friends is sooo diametrically different from hanging out with a romantic partner. There is no way to confuse the two at all. Even if a romantic couple is not physically touching, everyone around them knows that they are romantically linked. Ditto goes for the guy-friend-hang-out type situation. It's the vibes that bounce around in a sonar/molecular/electron type fashion that tips people off, I think.
MLK
Friday, April 26, 2002 at 20:37:21 (PDT)
Excuse people, but I made a statement when it comes to sticking people's tongue down someone else's throat in public. I have no qualms with holding hands, a quick kiss hello or goodbye. I do have a problem with a potential porno flick at the park in front of people. Is that good enough?
GET A HOTEL ROOM OK?
Friday, April 26, 2002 at 13:16:56 (PDT)
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