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GOLDSEA |
ASIAMS.NET |
ASIAN AMERICAN ISSUES
The White Stuff: Whiting Wongs & Wonging Whites
hey're our neighbors, buddies, allies, enemies, clients, bosses, employees, lovers and spouses. Many of us have more daily contact with Whites than with other Asians. Consequently, we often feel we know them better than they can ever know us. Maybe that's at the heart of our frustration as Asian Americans. They are as ubiquitous and pervasive as the air we breath while to them it seems we are eternal curiosities, outsiders, exotics.
Bridging the gap?
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And so we sometimes find ourselves lashing out with nasty generalizations about the people we blame for all that seems wrong with American society and, more specifically, our place in it. They are ignorant, shallow, boorish, smelly, sneaky, treacherous, malicious, dumb, weird -- in short, all the labels we feel have been so unfairly slapped on us.
But even as we hurl such epithets we cannot forget the countless acts of kindness, warmth, generosity, friendship, passion and love that we have enjoyed from these very same people. As our anger and frustration subside, we recognize that our fates are inextricably intertwined, not merely in sharing a world, a nation, a society, an economy, a culture -- but often in sharing even our most intimate lives. One in five of today's Asian American marriages are to Whites. And contrary to the imbalance of the past, the ratio of new AM/WF marriages to new AF/WM marriages is steadily approaching unity.
So we naturally have a strong interest in decoding the other side of the equation. Understanding is a two-way street. Fortunately, there are Whites who have enough interest in us as individuals to share their perspectives on us and on their interactions with us. This page is for those who -- as corny as it may sound -- have chosen to serve as bridges.
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Discussions posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:38:55 AM)
Sorry SK, I just mouthed off and it was wrong. However, I really get bored of people - what ever race they are - thinking they are either
1. not as good as (fill in blank)
2. much better than ( fill in blank)
First and foremost you are an indivual.
No one is just like you ! Even if you are a twin. Be happy with yourself and see your very best points...then you will admire Asian women, but not feel envious of them.
Once again I am sorry for my rudeness.
Hayley
Wednesday, April 03, 2002 at 11:46:28 (PST)
To SK, I don't know any white women that have ever voiced jealous/envy of AF's. Don't waste your time being jealous of them, a lot of them are snobby and full of themselves, and those are not admirable qualities. You sound like an intelligent, nice, humble person. Like yourself.
WF
Wednesday, April 03, 2002 at 08:58:36 (PST)
Poo,
Why are white people who learn asian stuff deemed "authorities"
I was always baffled in college when some white prof was labelled as "Authority of Asian American Studies"
I grew up in a black ghetto for a short time in my youth. No one ever labelled me as an "Authority of African American Studies"
AC Dropout
Tuesday, April 02, 2002 at 12:30:34 (PST)
"(ignorant parents raise ignorant children)."
How very true. Similarly, intelligent people raise intelligent children (hopefully). My 14 year old son started an origami club at his school, and is studying Japanese. He enjoys foreign films from all different countries, and likes to attend cultural events with me. He's quick to point out racism on tv, and make comments about it being wrong. I'm not a perfect parent, but at least I know my son isn't a bigot, and is sensitive to others, so I'm happy about that.
Sue
Tuesday, April 02, 2002 at 10:45:05 (PST)
WF, thank you for your comment. In response, I'd like to say that most of the white girls I know have voiced the same thoughts. Though, as I said before, I speak only for myself.
Hayley, thanks to you for your insightful, though rude, comment. Yes, I'm white, about as white as a person can get. In my previous post, I stated clearly that I have respect for Asian women, especially the stereotypical cultural values, and that has nothing to do with security. I haven't used anyone as a scapegoat, and if my post implied that, I'm sorry. I'm not aware of any comment I made that was racist or loathing.
SK
skowinwipat@yahoo.com
Tuesday, April 02, 2002 at 08:08:59 (PST)
To Hayley- SK is not pathetic! she is being honest about something that is probably pretty painful to talk about and you should not put her down like that. Are you 100% secure in yourself? I doubt it. Personally I can't see why WF's could possibly be jealous of AFs.
reply
Tuesday, April 02, 2002 at 06:49:36 (PST)
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