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ASIAMS.NET |
POLL & COMMENTS
ASIAN MALE/ BLACK FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:10 AM
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
Ok, I think that I am the woman that Jake Pham is talking about. I am not big and built. I am tall and thin, I just happen to have big breasts, that's all. My personal feelings on the matter were that asian men didn't think that black women were attractive and that's why they didn't approach black women. I thought this because you don't see many images portraying black women as beautiful like they do mixed black women or white or asian females. This is why I don't think I would approach an asian man for a relationship.
Tallmoka tkt1@cornell.edu
Friday, June 28, 2002 at 06:27:40 (PDT)
I just found out that I am pregnant. I am happy about the baby. But I am not happy with my boyfriend right now.
I don't want to be with him anymore. I think I am leaving Japan and going back home. I don't like the way hes been treating me lately. He made me quit my job. And I am sick of Japan too. The environment and the people sucks! I want to go home.
Mileena
Friday, June 28, 2002 at 00:19:20 (PDT)
To Asian M/African American F Universe:
On your comment about biracial children becoming alienated from an african american community - I would have to disagree with that statement. From my expereinces, african americans are more tolerant to biracial children. I would not say a majority of african americans are mixed with some part - but there is more than a handful of african americans who has another ethnicity mixed into them. That's my view of it. I just see a mixed kid with asian eyes, tan skin with wavy/curly hair beautiful.
Of course im not saying that we should obsess with the stereotypes on am and bw - but it should be agknowledged. You can't really be ignorant to ignorance can you?
jake pham phamine@juno.com
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 23:24:37 (PDT)
Inquiring mind wants to know,
I've been in that situation before. Hearing 'I love you' from someone before feeling it myself that is. Just coming out of a two year relationship that didn't end well at the time made him more understanding of my position (not wanting to get emotionally involved again so soon.
This may seem very corny response to 'I love you'. Don't take my word for it, because it depends on the lady your dealing with. It is a risk. I'm not good with words, but it could be a way to let her down easy.
Be honest, but still tell her and show her that you care for her. One response could be to tell her that it is beautiful hearing those words coming from her. Tell her she is beautiful, and desireable. Then show her.
Explore her as if she were the most desireable woman you've had the fortune to touch. Kiss her softly even tenderly.Then just hold her close.Tell her no lies!
Having shown your desire for her already, it is time to show her that is not all your relationship is about through some 'passionate' restraint. Meaning you've shown her you want to drink from her well, but would refrain out of respect for her no matter how much you may want her at that moment.
Tell her you care for her, and that she is special to you. Tell her honestly, that you don't know yet what is in your heart. Assure her you won't play with her's.
It is likely she'll cherish a memory like that despite not hearing those three words in return. Maybe just maybe she'll feel desired and respected even hopeful instead of rejected. Peace and good luck.
Cookie
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 20:21:16 (PDT)
Original...Peace and Happiness so you're the mom with the four children who said that you're black/white/and indian. We belong to several groups together and I don't believe you're for real. That story about that accident involving elders never happened. I live where you claim to live and it was not in the papers or on the news, so I know you must be a troll in disguise. This is why Asian men can't hook up with black wome too many of you are playas and immature.
nmad
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 13:25:38 (PDT)
Inquiring Mind tell her you love her, hit it and leave.
nmad
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 13:18:28 (PDT)
Asian M/African American F Universe black men are more hated than Asian men. How old are you people here?
nmad
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 13:15:50 (PDT)
Who don't enjoy looking at, feeling and dating fine women with nice racks?
nmad
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 13:14:05 (PDT)
007 in Tokyo you know your ass is going to get it for your honest comments? Women ask for preferences and once they hear them and they don't fit those preferences, they get mad.
nmad
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 13:13:22 (PDT)
CuteChicagoGirl,
Don't worry about it. People are always going to see negative images no matter what. You just have to block it out. Who cares what other people think. They don't feed or cloth you. You should just keep your chin up and know that you are beautiful and worth it. Asian Men are just men. Don't worry.
nagachampa
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 12:54:38 (PDT)
Nubian Goddess is right. Mixed is mixed and black is black, BUT, what her stupid ass doesn't know is that the REAL Nubians are genotypically (and phenotypically disregarding skin tone) Caucasians from North East Africa. She's a descendant of West African slaves NOT Nubians.
Rick
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 11:58:00 (PDT)
Inquiring minds want to know...
Just my opinion but I don't think you should ever tell someone you love them if you don't. Don't lie to her...that's obvious! Here's a thought though...she may not mean it either. If you aren't in love w/her, you should definitely tell her. If she leaves you over it, good riddance...you didn't love her anyway! Again, just my thought.
CaliGirl
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 11:42:26 (PDT)
Asian M/African American F Universe...
I understand what you are saying, however I do not totally agree. Are you the product of a mixed marriage? If not, I don't think you can speculate on how well adjusted these children are. I am and am completely well adjusted. I am not mixed w/Asian but I am Irish, Black and Native American. True, if I were mixed w/Asian, my experiences may have been different but I have NEVER experienced blatant racism from any group except blacks. Females, to be exact and that is probably only out of jealousy. And I almost hate to say this but I also think it depends on what the person looks like. Many bi-racial and multi-racial people are attractive and let's face it, attractive people are treated better, no matter WHAT mixture they are. I also disagree that black women are the most hated female group in America. That is simply not true. They are the 2nd most accepted group in America, second only to white women. I'm not quite sure where you got this statistic from.And finally, if I had to guess (and I stress "guess", I would say that middle Eastern men are the most hated group of men in American, not Asians.
CaliGirl
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 11:37:20 (PDT)
I would like to say I do not think Asian men are intimated by the African American woman, I think it is just a case of being shy. I belive most men go thru a period of shyness.
My boyfriend was never shy talking to me, in fact I was very shy responding to his affections due to the fact I did not think I was his type.
Before I met my boyfriend who is from China, I thought all asian men wanted smaller, petite women, well, that was my opinion and my opinion only. When we first saw each other 1 year ago, I refused to go talk to him on a deeper level for fear he would notice that I was not the smaller woman from his country, but a woman with full hips, thighs, etc, in other words not a size 6 but a larger size . But with his conversations, affections, and encouragement, we began a deep relationship that is going strong. I won't lie, I still feel funny when I see the smaller women from his country, but there was something that he said to me on our first date, he indicated that every man whether he is black, white, Asian, etc have their own preference of woman and that race is not an issue, it is the individual. He told me that his choice was me. I have and always appreciated these words. Even now we are experiencing situations with society, mostly from the people in his country when they see us together we get the typical stares, giggles, whispers, etc when ever I go to visit him in China.
I now understand that it is not the color of a man/woman's skin that matters in a relationship, but the connection of two people deciding to be together and to fight for the relationship full blast.
I wish all of the couples the best and my thoughts to you is to keep each other strong no matter what.
Xiu Lan teachinginchina@aol.com
Thursday, June 27, 2002 at 10:50:19 (PDT)
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