Asian Male/Black Female Relationships | Asian American Poll

ASIAN MALE/ BLACK FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:10 AM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most attracts you to African American females?
Their facial features | 36%
Their physique | 36%
Their attitude and personality | 27%
Their education & cultural values | 1%

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with African American females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 2%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 7%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 67%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 24%

Assuming you are an African American female, which of the following most attracts you to Asian males?
Their facial features | 77%
Their physique | 4%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 4%

Assuming you are an African American female, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with Asian males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 0%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 9%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 78%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 13%

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

Azn Romeo,

"She's not wrong, just not for me."

There's one thing that Dr. John Gray said;
"You don't have to be compatible or have averything on common with you r mate. If you ever hear the saying 'opposites attract' then you should learn that it does ring true. There's an episode of Frasier or Seinfeld where the guy thought he's found his soulmate because they have everything in common. but after awhile, he got tired of it, and he was like, 'I can't date her because she's just like me-and I don't want to date myself.'

The best thing to do is to just learn from your differencces, learn to compromise."

So instead of thinking that she's not right, think about what happened, or how it could have been done differently. Maybe it's just not your time. Meanwhile read "connecting with your soulmate."
The zen of chocolate sees all, knows all. Thursday, June 20, 2002 at 05:30:20 (PDT)

CuteChicagoGirl,

What in the world does it mean to act too ethnic? I am a Black woman who has kinky hair that I choose to wear in its natural state, because I love what God gave me, and I know that by wearing my hair this way I am showing everyone this, despite having society tell me that it's not attractive. Does that count as acting too ethnic? I mean, I'm intelligent, I speak proper English and I don't act loud and unruly in public.

Lamoire Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 20:22:50 (PDT)

i was just in a relationship with a filipino man, and i'm a black woman. i've always been attracted to asian men, but didn't think i would attract one. i'm not petite, so i didn't even pursue it.
of course, that was total generalization on my part, something that i don't condone.
simply put, men are men, and women are women.
queenmadi queenmadi@yahoo.com Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 18:07:31 (PDT)

Cinnamon-
Your comments are for the most part correct and I have heard that West Africans have ideal physiques but they definitely do not have mass. They are tall and very physically fit but they are not strong like body builders they are slender, strong, and all-around healthy like long distance runners. Human beings physiques around the world are a direct reflection of their environment. People that live in cold climates are short and stalky because that body type retains the most heat. People in warmer climates are long and skinny. Only in America and other developed countires do these rules not apply because we have a high standard of living (we are glutonous)and have time to worry about superficial things like physical appearance.
akaiinu sincity Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 15:57:45 (PDT)

Cute Chicago Girl,
Show some pride in who you are, and no one can make it bad for you in getting a date. If those AM won't date you because of what other BW have done... do you really want them? That is saying they lump all BW into one category, and are unable to see people as individuals. Listen, I'm very sweet and kind with my Asian man, but he saw my "ethnicity" early on and continues to see it. But that is who I am, sometimes when I get mad he sees me do certain "ethnic" gestures. He can either deal with it... or not.

I'm starting to get frustrated with the amount of posts I see from BW, (here, and other sites) who seem to be struggling with the notion that it's hard to get a date with an Asian man. I don't understand this.

I guess since I just happened to connect with my man, and never really had an overwhelming desire to date an AM. When BW tell me I'm lucky to have found this AM, it actually hurts my feelings, because I don't think they should feel that way b/c he's Asian; they should feel that because he's such a good man :(
Cinnamon Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 15:28:19 (PDT)

Hey everyone!!!

I don't know if anyone else has viewed the comments in the other boards but I typically didn't. Last night I did. One thing I noticed in ALMOST ALL of the polls for Inter-Asian and Intra-Asian dating categories is that both the women and men stated they don't think the other would find them attractive. I find this to be particularly funny b/c these high percentages were found even within the same ethnic groups (Japanese men, Japanese women; Corean men, Corean women). This leads me to think that many Asians (overall) don't think people, even those of their own race, would find them attractive. Anyone have any insight on why this seems to be the case?? Or do you think it's just a phenomenon with the people who post on GoldSea.com? I'm really curious!!
Caligirl Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 15:21:10 (PDT)

Cinnamon... Nice comments!! I highly agree.

CuteChicagoGirl... I agree with your comment too and it's such a shame. I also think that a lot of professional black men are turned off by black women that act "too ethnic". I could be wrong on this but I think you are actually referring to women that are loud, obnoxious and overall act "ghetto". Which would actually be different from acting too ethnic. I hate to think that anyone would confuse the 2 and I could be way off base on what you're talking about. At any rate, I think that women who act either ghetto (not feminine)or overemphasize their ethnicity may intimidate men of other races and make these men think the women wouldn't be interested. I just hope men don't attribute that to all black women b/c I know a lot of them will date men of other races. Ok, I've rambled on long enough! haha I'm done.
Caligirl Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 15:15:23 (PDT)

A question for Azn Romeo.
Where did you meet your friend from? Why did you both break up?
curious Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 14:05:57 (PDT)

Glad to read I was wrong believing most asian men wouldn't be attracted to a black female like myself. Since I'm off the 'market'it doesn't matter now. Just wanted to let asian men out there know they are as masculine and attractive as non-asian men. Whatever 'it' is they definitely have it. Sista's I think would appreciate confidence and intelligence in men the most. That is even sexy in an ugly man. Just come correct to BFs and you may be handsomely rewarded for the efforts.
Cookie Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 13:16:08 (PDT)

Cute Chicago Girl

Don't get discouraged by a few of the "ghetto girls" which is what I am assuming your trying to say when you mention "ethnic". Anyone with intelligence would not throw a whole race of people into one category , But if you carry yourself like a "nigger", a word that can be applied to ANYONE ignorant in ANY race or culture, then you have yourself to blame. How do you see yourself?
Farah Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 13:01:47 (PDT)

Azn Romeo

Very well put, it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders.

Hope You find that right one for you.

Peace
Farah Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 12:51:20 (PDT)

CuteChicagoGirl what is acting too ethnic?
Sean Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 12:46:55 (PDT)

Azn Romeo,

I know exactly how you feel. I'm going through the same thing except it's with a guy. It hurts soo much when you have to let go of someone you love. And your mind is cluttered with thoughts of them. I just hope I can move on one day. He was my first love. Good luck!

Broken Heart <3 Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 12:38:51 (PDT)

I can understand where Azn Romeo is coming from. I'm trying to forget a certain love from my past.
As much as I've tried to live my life, somehow he's still there.

We broke up due to misunderstandings, and yet we've had so much in common. Thus I didn't realize that our breakup would make me stronger.

I wish we could make peace, and just move on, but that's like teaching a whale how to walk on land.

Maybe we're not right for each other, or maybe it's just the wrong time, only God knows for certain what it's about. I was willing to make a sacrafice for the sake of what we've had. We've really had something special, and if he was here, I just want to thank him for it. We were always there for each other, and that was most important. We wouldn't have loved each other like we did if we didn't take care of each other.

If the next time an asian man ever does walk in my life again, I hope he's just as warm, loving, and caring as him.
The ORIGINAL Chocolate Bunny much love to ya Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 11:28:08 (PDT)

I'm an african- american woman who has always found asian men very attractive. I find all men to be beautiful creatures period. Until recently I doubted any asian man would be interested in me. I've had associates that I would have dated, if they were only interested. I figured cultural reasons to be a factor in their disinterest. Blacks have never been portrayed as desireable mates in the media. Once an asian male friend of my white husband once told him he thought black woman were too much like men. I'm not sure if he meant appearance, attitude, or both.
White men have always shown interest in black women openly or secretly. Asian men seemed off limits. The first time an asian man came onto me I was rather shocked. That individual I'm pretty certain only wanted a fling. Not that I didn't think of asian men like other men, but my idea of an asian man's ideal woman wasn't me. Asian men seemed to stick with either asian or white woman. Still there have been others who have shown more than a passing interest in recent years.
Cookie artist1328@aol.com Wednesday, June 19, 2002 at 11:26:39 (PDT)

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