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POLL & COMMENTS
 
ASIAN FEMALE/ CAUCASIAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
 
(Updated 
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:09 AM 
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
 
  
  
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WHAT YOU SAY
 
[This page is closed to new input.  --Ed.]
 
As a white male, I've heard many of my Asian female friends say something 
to the effect of this: "I think that it is creepy for WMs to only want to 
date AFs . It comes across to me as a form fetishism or racist. These are 
the same guys who would go on a Philippine sex tour; patronize a Korean 
massage bar; or whatever (similar) if they could get away with it. I mean 
it's all based on stereotypes of Asian women and is inherently racist" 
 
Well here's my question: how is this any different from asian women who 
only want to date white men (and, more specifically, NOT asian men)? 
Especially considering that most of these asian women have closer cultural 
ties with asian men, many if not most grew up around other asian families 
in their neighborhood, isn't this an especially extreme form of racism 
(against men of your own ethnicity)? 
 
I have gone out with several Asian women who tell me they have never dated 
an Asian man before, which I find VERY surprising. I mean think about how 
odd it would be to come across a white woman who has never dated a white 
man before- I'm sure it exists, but it is VERY rare. However, I have found 
this trend among many of the asian women I've dated. When asked about it, 
many say it is "just personal preference", but when this preference is 
shared by a very large percentage of asian women (in some asian subgroups, 
marrying a white man is MORE common than marrying an asian one) I think 
some deeper issues need to be explored. 
 
Some say dating an asian man would be "like dating their brother". How 
weird would this sound coming from a white woman-- "I could never date a 
white guy because it would be like dating my brother"? It would sound 
insane and you never see it-- why does this mindset exist in asian women? 
 
Many asian women tell me they like my blue eyes, and also express 
dissatisfaction about their own eyes. 3 of the asian women I've dated have 
had cosmetic surgery to make their eyes "look less asian". This makes me 
wonder something: if these women find asian eyes unattractive on 
themselves, is it not logical to say that they would not be attracted to a 
man with this feature (i.e., they would not be attracted to asian men)? 
Since this is an ethnic feature common to asians, is this not a form of 
self-hatred? 
 
Extending this argument further, if asian women don't find asian men as 
attractive as white men because of their asian features, then do they also 
feel that they are not as attractive as white women? An asian woman 
colleague of mine at work shocked me when she recently said of her new 
baby: "I'm glad I married 'Bob' so my baby doesn't look so 'Chinkie'". I 
was speechless, as I had no idea this mindset existed. Along this line of 
thinking, would an Asian woman find her daughter (with a white man) less       
attractive if the child inherited more of her asian features? Would an 
asian woman think of her child (with a white men) as less attractive than 
if the mother had been white? 
 
Some very interesting issues are raised here, and I hope to see some 
responses from Asian women on this. My experiences have been so consistent 
on this issue that I have stopped dating asian women altogether-- I don't 
want to be with someone who has self-hatred issues going on, and I don't 
want to be with someone who wants to be with me just because I'm white 
(and, more specifically, because I'm NOT asian).      
Matt Richardson   
 Tuesday, March 12, 2002 at 23:55:56 (PST) 
PS Filipina/Catholic girl: 
Why don't you ask your "dream guy" these questions? 
Sounds like you've got some insecurity issues going on behind the scenes.  
That's OK. It's natural and you're young. Be well, have a lot of Catholic kids don't let him glow under the black lights and prosper. 
just another white guy average_guy26@yahoo.com   
 Tuesday, March 12, 2002 at 22:04:26 (PST) 
To 22-year-old Filipina/Catholic girl hung up on race and origin regarding sex: 
You ask: Just curious, have you ever noticed a difference when making love to: 
1)an Asian woman born in the United States 
compared to  
2) an Asian born in her native country 
 
The short answer is "No." Like everything else it depends on the woman herself, not their skin color or where they were born.  
Though I've found Catholic girls seem to be somewhat repressed and guilt ridden regarding sex, despite their Asian or Anglo origins.  
Thanks for asking, 
Justin 
 
Justin   
 Tuesday, March 12, 2002 at 21:56:04 (PST) 
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